Well.
First
posts are always awkward. There's a pressure to impress what small
audience may happen upon your humble blog. There's always that fear
you may say the wrong thing and drive everyone away right off the
bat.
So here
goes nothing.
My name
is Sciaenops Ocellatus. Not my real name, I mean. My real name
begins with an “A.” But, the Internet being the wretched hive of
scum and villainy that it is, I am hesitant to mention my actual
name. The name “Sciaenops Ocellatus” is much more distinctive
and fun to say. Plus, it fits into the basic theme of this blog very
well.
What is
that theme, you wonder?
This blog is a review site dedicated to
various ocean-themed works out there. Anything from books to movies
to video games will be covered here in a relaxed and fun environment.
I'll be providing summaries of whatever my subject matter is, as
well as adding in fun facts about the real-life versions of the
critters and analyzation of the more artistic side of the story
(where applicable).
And it
will all be done without a single f-word. Because everyone else on
the Internet swears, and I like to swim against the current.
Each
review will have a basic layout. It'll look something like this:
BLOG TITLE
(Cover Image)
Title: (just
as it says: the title of the work (and any alternate titles) go here)
Rating: (if
the work has a rating, it will go here; otherwise, the lovely “N/A”
will make an appearance)
Media: (this
is where I tell you what category it falls into: book, television,
movie, video game, app, or other)
Genre: (this
is what genre the subject is, such as adventure or comedy or horror
and etc)
Creator: (name
of the work's writer, studio, or what have you)
Edition Reviewed:
(because I may own an older
edition (such as a two-disc DVD when the reader has a five-disc
BluRay), I will provide the edition I used for reviewing purposes for
clarity's sake)
And
after all of those technicalities, the review will begin in earnest.
And
after all of these
technicalities (ie, this entire introductory blog post), the reviews
will begin in earnest.
But before that, I'm sure that any readers I have at this moment are
asking themselves, “Why? Why is some fish-crazy chick from Texas
starting up a review site for fishy movies and stuff?”
Is it for money? No. It might happen in the future, sure. But I'm
not in this just for the money.
Is it for fame? No. I don't want to be hyper-famous like some
Internet-based review websites. It seems like too much trouble to
maintain fame. If I never become famous for doing this fish blog,
that's perfectly okay.
So why am I doing this?
Well, gather round your dear old Auntie Sci and she'll tell you a story...
I've loved the ocean since my grandpa put me on his lap, told me
crazy fish stories, and taught me how to recognize over 100 different
fish species by sight when I was five years old. I started
volunteering at an aquarium in June of 2002; I was only eleven years
old. I worked my hardest to learn as much about the ocean as I
could. I was going to be a marine biologist and play with dolphins
all day. I got into my dream college: a marine-biology based campus
that was advertised to be a haven for college kids like me.
And,
through a series of events
too numerous to list here, I
crashed and burned.
I
eventually graduated with an Associates of Art. I was ready to start anew, get a job, and become a fully-functioning member of society. But I still loved
the ocean. Was there some way to combine a love for art with my love
for the sea?
A writing teacher suggested that I put my talents to use by becoming
a film critic.
This
came right after discovering a fun fish movie that no one I knew wanted to
watch because they wrote it off as a rip-off of Finding
Nemo.
And then it all fell into place.
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